First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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