Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
