they need to just BURY HIM!
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
