Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
my shit smells like andre
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I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
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I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
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