I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
