She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize