he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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