kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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