Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
