what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Randomize
