she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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