the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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