You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I cockslap morals
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
