i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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