Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
