CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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