How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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