i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Randomize
