I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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