Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Dick very happy bro
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
