I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
This house was built for laser tag.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
