i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize