Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
