Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
dude i'm inner monologue high
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
