yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
