$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
did i just pee glitter
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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