if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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