Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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