I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
