hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
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