ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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