my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
