Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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