I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
