real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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