where am i from again
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize
