yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
My pussy is not your playground.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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