Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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