Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
