So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
