I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
