Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I just found a bag of teeth...
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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