Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
