Your tits are I can't wait for
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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