How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
