Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
