dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
