You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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