Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
