dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Randomize
