Ambien. No doubt about it.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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