What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize